Susanne's Two Cents

I know this is not the place for quick, short posts, but my God, how much time does it waste to play these online games? I’m not talking about playing educational games, which research is showing are effective for learning. I’m talking about recreational gaming. How much time out of our precious lives is being wasted on this stuff? You can spend HOURS playing games, building your realm/kingdom/whatever, and to what effect? What do you have to show for it, after all, when all is said and done? (offline) Nothing. What a colossal waste of time most of these are.

I know some people think Mary Oliver, as a poet, is overrated, but some of her poems still make me weep, in a good way. So maybe I’m just too easily impressed. Whatever!
I’m still loving this one right now:

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting —
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

What does it mean to love unconditionally? What would that literally look like? We want to apply our own modifications to that term, and it will look a little different to each of us as we put our own spin on it. For the majority, I think, it means that we feel we should be loved no matter what we do. I agree, especially if we belong to a loving creator who owns us, no matter what. Does that mean, though, that the creator, or anyone else, should love everything we do as well? Even if we love our children unconditionally, which most of us think we do, does it mean that we are happy and supportive of everything they do? I hope not. I do not support my children or anyone else who thinks they need, for instance, to hurt others. I don’t support acts of selfishness, violence, dishonesty, or lack of honor in any form. Does that mean I don’t love those who do them? Of course not; I do not cease to love when I dislike or even hate the behavior. Supporting those I love does not mean I support everything they do; this is true even if they are doing things they believe will make them “happy,” if that means they are acting dishonorably or immorally.

Nor can I excuse myself when I behave badly. I do not expect support for my bad behaviors.

I would hope someone would love me enough to tell me that I have spinach between my teeth, that my breath stinks, that I am acting like an ass.

Love sometimes means having to say, “Hey! I love you, but you’re acting like an idiot!” That’s unconditional love. I go on loving you no matter what, even when I hate what you do, and even when I have to say so. I hope those who love me would do the same.

Just my two cents…

My Dears;
If you love a good read that is not just your typical “bodice ripper” romance, please give Deanna Raybourn a chance. Her novels are mysteries, romances, lovely grammatically correct and Victorianly whimsical all at once. Her blog appears at http://www.deannaraybourn.com/blog/. However, start with her first novel; it will definitely keep you coming back for more, if you are addicted to that kind of thing, which I am. I do NOT enjoy the simple hot-sex, rip-my-clothes-off romp that are what are classified as “romances” these days. Raybourn’s novels are wonderful, simply put.

I am finding that trust is something that I have given away too cheaply. Someone seems to “get” you; he/she seems to know that you are so deep, so in earnest, and he/she agrees! Suddenly, you are a team….Be careful. Not everyone who seems to know you, who you are, what you stand for, what makes you “tick,” is really for you, on your side. Understanding that makes anyone who has been wooing you by seemingly understanding you stand in a new light. Who are they? What is their purpose? I’m not saying that we should never trust anyone. I am saying that we need to guard our souls. Not everyone has a pure motive for admiring you, for connecting to you. I am just saying, “Please be vigilant.” I have not always been, and people who do not have integrity can sneak in, into the areas where we are vulnerable. Be careful!!!

When I am well, I forget what pain is like. I think we all do. As with the well-used example of the woman in childbirth goes, if you remembered pain like that, you’d never have another child. The memory of some kinds of pain fades; however, the memory of other kinds does not.

At any rate, over the last weekend I had occasion to remember this idea. I sometimes have very intense flare-ups of the disease that has become part of my life. It is strange, when you are in the middle of intense and ongoing pain, to remember that, should it actually fade, even temporarily, we tend to forget its existence.

And yet, while it is in the spotlight in your life, it’s hard to ignore. It becomes your world because there is no escape. It is all about the pain.

I think the worst part of that is how it places me so much in the center. It’s hard to forget myself, and I do so wish to.